I N D E B T E D

I don’t know who you are. I don’t know who that woman was to you. I don’t know why you and your mother were there and were thankful to that woman. The tears in your eyes were a mystery to me like the land beyond the stars. What she had done for you is a blank left for my curiosity alone to be filled.

But I want to know your story. What led both of you to be at the same place as I was. Whether you go to a good school or if you have a good family suddenly became a constant visitor on my mind.

You, a stranger in my life, made me grateful somehow. The quest I had for that day seemed frivolous and I painfully became aware of the dearth of hunger, the welcoming home I was returning to.

B L A C K. P O W E R.

I am not black. I do not live in the U.S. I’ll never endure the struggles of systemic racism that black Americans battle everyday.

I’m south Indian and I don’t have the conventional dark complexion. But have I been judged for my skin colour?   Yes. I have been complimented on my “fairer” skin multiple times and it has always made me uncomfortable because I can’t endorse compliments for the wrong reasons. It breaks my heart when I see real beauty being disregarded in the name of extra melanin. “You have really nice features BUT you are dark” or “you would have been really pretty if you weren’t dark” or “at least you don’t have dark skin” are some  snippets of casual colourism cruising through our country. Fair skin is seen as the epitome of beauty (despite it being the country’s minority) giving rise to an abundance of enraging practices for which this blog alone won’t be enough. As a side note, I want to say its absolutely unacceptable and wrong to insult anyone based on their skin colour whether it’s light or dark because I have also been on the flip side as well. If you want to compliment someone, talk about their style, how their makeup is done, how they carry themselves, attributes they have control over and not innate things they cannot change. But colourism is not what comes under the banner of the BLM movement. Casteism thriving in India is what can be paralleled to racism in the U.S. where a certain group of people are discriminated and denied privileges the greater part of the country are entitled to.

We as humans have an inherent need to establish ourselves better than our fellow beings which isn’t necessarily a bad thing until it manifests into a position of superiority or a sense of superiority complex culminating into generations of oppression. Race, ethnicity, sex are mere outlets for this sick mentality. Police brutality, mob lynching, religious and communal riots are all products for which poor, innocent citizens always bear the brunt. There isn’t a single sensible reason as to why racism exists. It’s not like black people are born with guns for hands. That’s how absurd racism appears to be. It’s something that has been passed from ancestors throughout generations and has become so intertwined in our lives you cannot weed it out from a single glance. Black crimes, gang violence, fraud schemes are just a result of this injustice. For example, a black man steals food for his family because he has been denied the opportunities his white counterpart has the privilege over in terms of higher education, a well-paid job, healthcare, housing facilities and freedom all because of his skin colour. And due to that same skin colour innocent people can be deemed as criminals and  we lose a father, a healthcar worker, a pet lover, a daughter, a son. This is NOT okay. This is NOT right.

We have to reflect upon ourselves and microanalyze racism and teach others. Most importantly we have to actively fight against it being the forebearers of our future generations. Let this poison die within our time. Learn and unlearn. Have open conversations. Check if you or your close ones encourage racist behaviour.

T W E N T Y. T W E N TY.

Concealed visages and wary eyes,

beguiled households and deserted concerts,

birthday candles blown out through screens,

blue light turned into a student’s classroom,

bleeding soles along a well trodden path,

fists raised and knees bent,

this is our world today.

To say that the beginning of a new decade has been a maelstrom of events would be an understatement. Many a time in this unprecedented juncture, I have had to delete my social media and disconnect once in a while to regain my bearings because of the overwhelming tragic events and reporting of injustice. Its great that we are finally standing up against atrocities that have been going on for way too long even if it had to take a pandemic. But it can take a toll on your mental health as well especially if some things happen that cant be subdued and all we can do is to find a way to navigate and be there for each other. Though Covid19 has distanced all of us physically, it has also awe-inspiringly tied the whole world together.

Self reflection and social connections are equally important. We have become so engrossed in the rat race of life setting aside our likes that once we are presented with the luxury of time, we find ourselves at odds.